When the Greats Quit
“The graveyards are full of indispensable men.” — Charles de Gaulle
He was one of those hard-working team member, always eager to take on a challenge, and to deliver. So when he resigned right after the annual appraisal call, I took it personally. Specially since I got him a promotion and what was considered a significant hike.
I replayed every conversation in my head. What could I have done differently? Where did my communication fail? Should I have pushed harder for him? What did I miss?
And chances are that, if you've been a leader for long, you'd have had someone talented leave disappointed. The bitter truth is - This is a departure that will linger longer than the ones that chose to stay.
This week, I want to talk about something that we, as leaders, never want to talk about.
The resignation I'll never forget
He was smart. Trusted. Reliable. Worked with integrity. Bursting with ideas. Energetic.
He expected a promotion and a 30% hike. He got the promotion, but the business couldn't give him the number he demanded.
The reasons were not unfair:
Budget constraints
Role calibration
Timing
Organizational priorities
But fairness and disappointment can exist together.
24 hours later, he resigned. I still remember reading the email in silence.
It felt like watching a perfectly maintained car leave the garage because the owner no longer trusted the road ahead.
Not broken. Not failing. Just done waiting...
Ugly truths
Early in my corporate career, I've seen and heard people exit because they didn't get paid enough.
Naturally, I believed retention was mostly about compensation.
Ugly truth #1 : It is not.
People leave when:
Growth feels invisible
Recognition feels inconsistent
Trust weakens
The future becomes blurry
Money simply becomes the accelerant that torches the flame the heart sparked.
Ugly truth #2: Many managers become defensive after resignations.
“We did our best.” “They were impatient.” “They didn’t understand the bigger picture.” "They were a wrong hire." and the list of excuses are creative and endless. Sometimes, and if you are unlucky, you may even become the reason why people leave.
The truth is, sometimes, all of these are true.
As a practicing coach, I asked myself “What did this experience feel like from his side?”
This loaded question changed how I led people from there on.
Signs in the dashboard
Modern cars always warn you before a catastrophic failure. There are plenty of alerts and signals that you will miss if you don't keep your eyes wide open:
Small noises
Dashboard lights
Changes in steering
Reduced responsiveness
Teams work the same way. People don't wake up one morning and write their resignation letters. The Letter is something that culminates after months of:
Withdrawal from discussions
Reduced initiative
Emotional detachment
Quiet frustration
Less curiosity
Managers miss these signs because they are looking at delivery metrics instead of emotional momentum. We aren't looking at the signs in the dashboard when we are laser focussed on the road ahead.
What made me better
I became far more intentional about career conversations. Not just: “How is the project going?” Or "What did you miss this week?"
Instead, I asked:
“How are you feeling about your growth?”
“Do you still see a future here?”
“What feels unclear?”
“What’s frustrating you that you haven’t said yet?”
Interestingly, this curiosity created honesty and transparency. And honesty creates opportunities to recognise and repair trust before that resignation letter gets thought of.
Over time, I realised that appraisals do not create disappointment, they just reveal accumulated disenchantment. This new learning also made me a calmer manager.
Finally..
Great people will still leave. Because sometimes leaving is the right decision for them. Maturity is understanding that retention is important, but ownership is impossible.
While you can build trust, clarity, growth, and support, you cannot drive someone else’s journey forever.
At some point, we all must make the often tough decision to take the path that feels most profitable for us.
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